HipAeroNerd

Social security needs to be reformed. Regardless of the projection used, everyone agrees that social security will not be able to meet its future obligations at some point in time in the future. While private accounts do not address fixing this problem, they provide a solution to another problem.

Political leaders and lobbysits can debate when obligations will not be met and how serious it will be; what they cannot debate is a financial analysis of the benefits social security provides. The annualized rate of return on investments (your taxes paid into) social security is about 2%. This compares with about 6% for "risk-free" treasury securities and 11% for the for the S&P 500. You may say, Wall Street can’t be trusted with everyone’s retirement. While I disagree with that, I recognize and accept that not everybody has the same faith in the markets that I, as an MBA, do. They are free to leave their money in the current social security system. Private accounts should be completely voluntary. I, on the other hand, should be free to invest my retirement money as I see fit. I would much rather realize a return on 11% instead of 2%.

As many of you are painfully aware, I am attempting to teach myself Portugués in preparation for my trip to Brazil. While thumbing through my Lonely Planet Brazillian Portuguese phrasebook, I came across the following entry in the sex section between "Oh my God" and "It’s my first time: "Não se preocupe, eu mesmo faço" Translated, this means "Don’t worry, I’ll do it myself". I’m glad the good people at Lonely Planet have a sense of humor involving the bad reach around.

Frankfurt, Germany. 20:50 11 Nov 2004

I am now sitting in my hotel room at the InterCity, Frankfurt across the strasse from the Hauptbahnhof listening to German pop music. I just
saw on CNN International that Yasser Arafat’s body has landed in Cairo,
in preparation for his funeral. It is interesting that just five hours ago, I
was there, where the news is being made. His funeral will be held in the Arab
League building, which is on the main square that is also home to the Egyptian
Museum and the American
University of Cairo.
CNN was advising people to avoid the area because of the huge crowds of both
fans, fanatics, and protesters, as well as the heightened security for all the
diplomats who will be paying their respects.

Flughafen Frankfurt Am Main, Germnay 11:45 12 Nov 2004

After meandering through various inefficient security lines
for almost an hour an a half, I am finally ready to board my flight to Dulles.
My passport was checked 5 times, my boarding pass 3 times, and I passed through
a metal detector and had my carry-on luggage x-rayed twice. While there is
something to be said about “protecting the homeland”, this is ridiculous. More
security does not make a country more secure. Smart, efficient security does.
X-raying my carry-on bags a second-time was a waste of everyone’s time and
money; anything would have been found the first time. Now that I am done
bitching, I will reflect upon my trip…

My trip to Cairo
was a wonderful, once in a lifetime opportunity. I was able to experience a
culture very different from my own, and one in which the policies of our
government have a great effect. I was able to see the ancient antiquities and monuments,
from the Pharonic Era to the Greco-Roman and Eastern-Orthodox Era, to the
Islamic Era. While I did many of the typical “touristy” things, I also
experienced many things the typical tourist would not. I ate at local
restaurants, where the menu was only in Arabic. While my trip was wonderful, I
am glad to be on my way home. I saw and experienced what I wanted to see and
experience, and now I’m ready to return to Western culture. I am looking
forward to fitting in, and not sticking out like a sore thumb, as a six foot
tall red head does in the Middle East. I am also looking
forward to breathing easier, as Cairo
was very, very dusty and polluted. Most importantly, I am looking forward to
not being constantly hassled or tried to sell some service or product I do not
really want to purchase.

Lastly, I wanted to  say a special thank you to Chris.  He was nice enough to allow me to stay with him for over a week, and to show me around. We all know how difficult  this princess can be. I really appreciate it.

Cairo, Egypt. 00:25 11 Nov 2004

Poor, poor Clark. After dinner,
Chris, Hussein, Clark, and I decided to go on a felucca ride on the Nile.
The previous night, Clark had been on a date with a
cute, but politically troubled Egyptian guy, so Clark decided
to call this guy to see if he wanted to join us. His date was in a cab going
the opposite direction on the same street on which we were driving. Clark called to tell him to get out of the cab and walk across the street. Not being
the brightest star in the sky, in the words of Clark, he
couldn’t quite figure out this concept. When he finally figured out how to walk
across the street, he crammed into Hussein’s car and we proceeded toward our
destination on the Nile. The entire time we were in the
car, Clark’s date was talking on his cell phone in
Arabic, while Clark sat there waiting, looking bored.
When we arrived at the felucca, he continued talking on his phone until Clark asked him, angrily, to turn it off. While on the half hour cruise, he answered
it four times and went to the bow of the felucca to chat. As Clark later admitted, Cairo standards are
nothing like New York standards;
the pickin’s are rather slim…and well… a girl’s got to eat. While walking
back to the car, Clark’s date needed to stop in a hotel
to use the facilities, but did not want to go alone. He tried convincing
Hussein to accompany him to no avail. Finally Clark went
to “guard the door” for him. Once back in the car, he again talked on his cell
phone the entire way to their apartment. Right now, poor Clark is sitting in his room with a very, very annoyed look on his face. I will now
associate that look with Cairo
desperation.

Cairo, Egypt. 18:00 9 Nov 2004

Last night, Chris and I had dinner with his friend Basel,
who has lived for the past five years in a suite at the Intercontinental Hotel.
Basel was invited, by the
government, to come to Egypt
and start an internet service provided (ISP). He is a very eccentric man, who
smokes at least one joint a day; during Ramadan, he must smoke three. After
work, he says he needs an “Attitude Adjustment” after dealing with “All those
fucking Egyptian idiots.” Because of Basel’s
connections at the Intercontinental, we got dinner at The Bird Cage, a Thai
restaurant, for half price (only 180 pounds).

Today, Chris and I first went to the Gayer-Anderson Museum. John Gayer-Anderson was a
British major, who restored the two adjoining houses, donated by the Egyptian
government, from 1935 to 1942. The government donated the houses to him, under
the condition that he would donate the houses, including all the artifacts and
paintings he filled within, to the government upon his death, in order to make
a museum. One room in the house was a set in the James Bond movie, The Spy Who
Loved Me. The whole house was fascinating. There were Oriental rooms, Persian
rooms, and rooms filled with his own paintings. It even had a secret room from
which the harem (or ladies) could listen in on the men.

Afterwards, I tried for a second time to find the Blue
Mosque, with the assistance of my Arabic-speaking friend Chris. After asking
four different men, and being shown to two mosques that were clearly not the
Blue Mosque, we found the Real McCoy. We never would have guessed it from the
outside, but the parts of the inside that had been restored were beautiful. The
mosque got its name from Prince Aqsunqur, who added all the blue Turkish tiles
to the mosque. It is a UNESCO site, currently undergoing restoration.

For lunch, we had the Egyptian students’ equivalent of our
Ramen noodles. The dish was a combination of rice, pasta, and lentils, with a
spicy tomato sauce. It was only 3 pounds (fifty cents), but very delicious.

Cairo, Egypt. 23:50 9 Nov 2004

In an effort to do all of the “touristy” things in Cairo,
Chris and I went to the Sound and Light Show at the Giza Pyramids. Since Chris
helped write part of the new show (still in development), we had free front row
seats and were personally welcomed by the owner. It really pays to have
connections. The show was a little cheesy, with the Sphinx telling Egyptian
history, but it was enthralling nonetheless. It was informative, and seeing the
Pyramids and Sphinx lit up with various colors was entertaining, and would be a
stoner’s dream.

After the Sound and Light show, we tried going to an Egyptian
restaurant in Giza, but as with
everything in this country, it was closed for Ramadan. Therefore, we went back
to Maroush for more Lebanese food and tashish for Chris. We played a game of
Chess, in which I was victorious (not to be boastful), while waiting for our
food, and then we watched three queens sitting next to us checking us out. I
will let the following picture speak for itself.

I have decided that one should never travel to a Muslim
country during the month of Ramadan. Everything closes early, if it even opens
at all. All the bars and clubs are closed, because while Muslims are not
supposed to drink alcohol any time during the year, the government really does
not allow it during Ramadan. Similarly, all movie theaters are closed because
an unmarried woman could, Allah forbid, hold hands with a man. During Ramadan,
even married couples are not allowed to have sex. Between sunrise and sunset,
no one can eat, drink (even water), or smoke. Therefore, by about 3pm, people tend to be crabby and irritable.
Then, once the evening prayer is completed, about 5pm,
all the Muslims gorge themselves at iftar (which means break fast). I use the
term gorge literally. While the original intent of Ramadan was to feed the poor
at iftar, it has turned into all-you-can-eat, not all-you-care-to-eat feast.
One-third of the agricultural output of Egypt
is consumed during the month of Ramadan. Furthermore, the fasting during the
day is supposed to bring one closer to Allah. However, all it does is force
everyone to flip their schedules upside down. Everyone will leave work early to
go home and nap until iftar. Then they will eat, eat again around 11pm, and possibly again at 5am. Then they work a few hours and the trend continues.

Basel,
who works at the ISP, complains that no work is done during the month, because
everyone leaves early, and for the few hours they are at work, they are tired,
hungry, and crabby. In conclusion, I will hand it to them for managing to get
nearly a month of easy work.

Cairo, Egypt. 16:30 8 Nov 2004

Chris has already seen Islamic Cairo, and did not care to
see it again, so Chris’s roommate Clark and I went out. We visited the Citadel,
which is a fortress sitting atop a hill overlooking all of Cairo.
The views from the top were stunning, as were the Mosque of Mohammed Ali and
the other mosque (insert name here). There was also a fascinating museum for
the Egyptian armed forces from ancient times until the present. It was
interesting that the conflict of 1967, where Israel
defeated Egypt,
was not mentioned, while there was a whole room devoted to the War of 1973 in
which Egypt regained Sinai, only part of their land lost, from The Enemy. Note also, that
they did not mention the name Israel,
as at the time it wasn’t even officially recognized as a state.

After the Citadel, Clark got into a
cab and I was going to walk to the Blue Mosque. This is where our separate
experiences began. Clark’s cab driver stopped about one
block away from the Citadel, where I was walking on the sidewalk, and got into
a physical fight with three other men. Bewildered, Clark jumped out of the cab and quickly hailed a new one, as I walked swiftly past
the incident. About a few blocks further, with Clark safely on his way, I sat down to look in my Lonely Planet guide, to find out
how to get to the Blue Mosque. An Egyptian man approached me and said he wants
to practice his English and he would walk with me to the Blue Mosque if I
critiqued his English. This should have been a giant red flag for me, but it
appeared he was taking me in the right direction so I figured I would trust
“Egyptian hospitality” for the time being. He quickly led me down a series of
windy, narrow streets, out of which I could not navigate on my own, to an old,
dirty, run down mosque. He tried to convince me that this was the Blue Mosque,
because there were four blue tiles on one wall, and that I should pay 40 pounds
to see the mosque and climb up the minaret. Knowing I could not get out on my
own, I begrudgingly paid the 40 pounds, knowing that I had been had. After
paying, the man collecting money at the mosque informed me that I must respect
Egyptian hospitality, and that I should join him in a small room for some tea.
I began to enter the room, but noticed there were no escape routes, and quickly
retreated and said I did not have time for tea, but would like my tour. I
climbed the stairs of the minaret, where I saw three European tourists who
appeared equally displeased at being had. Upon exiting the mosque, I informed my
“friend” that I needed to get back to Zamaleck. He hailed me a cab, requested
some money for his guidance services, and went on his way. I was so frustrated
I just headed back to Chris’s apartment to relax for a bit before going to the
gym. I now believe that Egyptian hospitality is present when they are trying to
sell you something or swindle you in some way. While this is a very safe city,
and I never once through my “hassle” felt that my safety was in danger, there
is something to be said about the annoyances of swindling. (http://hipaeronerd.blogs.friendster.com/photos/cairo_odyssey/pb080069.html)

Cairo, Egypt. 07:41 6 Nov 2004

Today has been a relatively relaxing and low-key day. We
slept in until 11 before going to the Egyptian museum. There, we saw the Royal
Mummy collection, and various ancient artifacts, including jewelry from King
Tut’s tomb. I find the half-animal, half human gods to be the most interesting.
After the museum, we went to a great Egyptian restaurant where I sampled the
local cuisine.

While walking down the street, an Egyptian man approached us
who claimed to be an important man that had lived in Minneapolis for several years. He pulled Chris and I by our arms into his little shop and
offered us Coke while showing us a log and pictures of the various important
people whom he knows, including the current president of Egypt.
When Chris and I said that we must get going and did not want a coke, he became
angry and yelled to get out of his shop. What an odd experience.

Cairo, Egypt. 18:45 7 Nov 2004

Today, I ventured out on my own for the first time since
I’ve been here. Well, other than going to the market or the internet café. I
took a cab down to Coptic Cairo. This is the section of town in which the Greek
Orthodox Church built its cathedrals and monasteries. Getting there, the cab
driver dropped me off on the wrong side of the subway tracks, so I had to
wander thru this market in a very poor neighborhood to get to a footbridge over
the tracks. There were live chickens, ducks, and geese for sale, as well as
various carcasses, fruits, and vegetables.

http://hipaeronerd.blogs.friendster.com/photos/cairo_odyssey/pb070009a.html

Once I got to the Coptic Cairo compound, the cathedrals were
beautiful and well worth the adventure. I then wandered down the street to the
oldest and second largest mosque in Africa. I had a very
friendly guide who explained to me how Muslims use a mosque and the
significance of each part. I think it’s very telling how there is a curtain
down the middle that divides the men from the women. I’m still amazed at seeing
women, completely covered by her burqa, except for her eyes.

After Coptic Cairo, I took a cab over to the Cairo tower. The driver dropped me off four blocks away and tried to charge me 20
pounds for a trip that should have cost six. I gave him 10 and left the cab
with him still yelling and honking at me.

Back in the 1960’s, the CIA bribed then Egyptian President
Nasser with several million dollars in hopes of influencing Middle
East politics. Nasser took the money, and
then used it to build a 65m tall phallic tower, Cairo
Tower, as an extended middle finger
to the Americans. The tower was constructed in what I consider very
representative Egyptian style. The lobby is made of marble and immaculately
clean. You reach the top via a dinky elevator. Once there, you must walk up a
narrow staircase with chipped paint and holes. I used to think American’s were
the kings of doing things half-assed. I was sorely mistaken. The panoramic
views of the city from the top were breathtaking.

After Cairo Tower, Chris and I went to the Intercontinental
Hotel, where Chris’s friend Basel lives, and we laid by the pool for the rest
of the afternoon. For dinner, Chris and his friends and I went to a Ramadan
dinner festival and had some delicious Egyptian cuisine and interesting
conversations about our baggage from past relationships.

Cairo, Egypt. 01:15 6 Nov 2004

My second day in Cairo was tour-iffic. We took a taxi from Chris’ to Giza.
Our taxi let us out in this stable where locals tried to convince us the only
way to get to the pyramids is by camel. We knew this wasn’t the case, so we
went to a café to regroup. However, one of the guys followed us there, and sat
at our table. While drinking our Fanta, he continued to try and convince us we
needed to take a camel. Chris and I are in agreement that camels are filthy,
smelly, ill-mannered animals. After successfully ditching him, we found another
cab driver. This guy, Kamelle, was great. For 120 pounds, he drove us
everywhere all day. We went to the pyramid of Sakarra (the step pyramid).

There, I went into the Tomb of the Two Brothers. This is the
only tomb in Egypt in which two men were buried. Some archeologists think that they were gay
lovers. They were both overseers of the manicurists (even back then the queens
were in the grooming business) to the pharaoh and there is a hieroglyph of them
hugging in the burial chamber. After Sakarra, we went to the pyramids of Darshur,
where we saw the red pyramid and the bent pyramid.

The bent is pyramid is bent because they hand to change the
angle halfway through construction because of structural instability. The nerd
in me found this tidbit very interesting. Our next adventure led us to a carpet
school, where little boys and girls learn to weave. They had many beautiful,
handmade tapestries from silk, wool, and camel hair. After the carpet school,
we went to the papyrus museum where we learned how papyrus paper is made. Between
those two tourist traps, I spent 1800 pounds. Because Chris lives in Cairo and speaks Arabic, I paid less than 50% on all items. After dropping the cash,
we went to the pyramids of Giza,
where there are three large pyramids, nine small, and the Sphinx.

During Ramadan, all the bars are closed. Craving a drink,
with my alcoholism raging, Chris, his roommate Clark, his friend Jeff, and I,
decided to go to the Chile’s floating on the Nile. We figured an American
restaurant would serve booze; we were mistaken. I think it’s hilarious I flew
for 16 hours to eat at a Chile’s.
After the mission failure at Chiles’s
we finally wandered to the tea garden at the Marriot, which is a very cruisy
place for gay men, and I was able to get my margarita.

Cairo, Egypt. 21:00 4 Nov 2004

My Lufthansa, or flying bus, flight to Cairo was less eventful than my flight into Frankfurt. The
screaming babies were not in my row, and there were only three of them in my
cabin. However, one of the tires in the landing gear was flat, so we had to
wait to land “just in case”.

Upon arriving in Cairo,
there was a mass of people at the international arrivals building. I wandered
the length of terminal two twice trying to find my friend Chris. Finally,
starting to worry, I sat down outside to ponder my options. An Egyptian man
approached me and asked if I needed a cab. I said I was trying to find a
friend. For two euros, I used his phone to call Chris, who was waiting at
Terminal 1.

After reuniting with my friend Chris, we took a taxi to his apartment in Zamalek. Cairo is how I imagined it on one hand, but very different
on another. It is a very, very dirty city. There are many run down streets and
buildings. The traffic signals and lane markings are merely suggestions, of
which no one heeds. It is every man for himself. However, at the same time, it
is an intriguing combination of Islamic and traditional culture and recent
globalization. Next to an old mosque is a Pepsi ad, with young, attractive,
Egyptian men and women in western-style clothing drinking Pepsi. Chris rents a
condo from the owner of the 13^th floor. The floor itself is
immaculate, with beautifully carved wooden doors. The staircase is covered in
cat poop from the many strays that live in the building, and the lobby was a
former shopping mall, now boarded up

Flughafen Frankfurt Am Main, Germany 08:00 4 Nov 2004

My flight across the Atlantic was not
as pleasant as I had hoped. While United may be known as the friendly skies, I
guarantee I was not contributing to the name. Sitting in my row were three
crying kids, and we know how much I love children. Well, to be correct, they
only cried for the first three hours and the last thirty minutes. There were
four hours of relative quiet interspersed. Seated in the three rows in front of
the galley were 30 German teenagers who needed to take pictures with a flash
every five minutes. At least there was some eye candy in the group. We were
also about an hour late leaving because eight containers of baggage got
“misplaced” and we had to wait for them to load it onto our plane. When we
finally arrived in Frankfurt, thankfully only 15 minutes
late, we had an outside parking spot and had to take a bus into the terminal.

Since I am a “transit customer”, there is a small gate area in which I am
allowed. They won’t let me go to the restaurant because it’s on the other side
of the rope and the surly German man is…well…surly. So, I decided to try
connecting to a T-Mobile hotspot, but I keep getting error pages in German, and
I fear I have just wasted 8 euros.

Flughafen Frankfurt Am Main, Germany 08:30 4 Nov 2004

Apparently, Lufthansa checks your boarding pass before entering
the waiting area. This large group on seniors from Texas could not quite figure this out. The surly, and now angry, Lufthansa worker
announced it twice that we had to leave, and they all just sat there looking
stupid and giving American tourists a bad name. Finally, the man started
yelling and physically escorting all the Texans out of the gate area. He then
said a bunch of, what I’m sure are not pleasant, comments to his co-worker. The
Texans still don’t understand what is going on.